Its Been… A Year…. 2017 Review

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This year has definitely been one for the books. It had some of the most incredible highs I’ve ever experience, but also some of the lowest lows.

Getting engaged, after years of hoping and wishing and praying was probably the highest I’ve ever been (I don’t do drugs). That night is one I will never EVER forget, specifically the adorable look on A’s face when he asked me to be his forever.

My love for him continues to grow on a daily basis, after so many years of being together  we still continue to surprise each other, grow as humans & as a couple. As we grow and experience new phases of life, we learn to work through major decisions together and as a team. Our love continues to grow as we do and I am so proud of him as a man, a partner (in business) and as my soon to be hubby. He pushes me to be a better person regularly and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life & start a family with him!

This year has also reinforced what wonderful friend’s I have. I am so blessed to have made some of the most incredible friendships both old and new. The friendships I made this year are ones I know I will have for the rest of my life, and are something truly special.

I’ve had a lot of personal & professional growth this year as well. Professionally, I’ve expanded my role at MaxExposure and am so grateful for the experiences / knowledge I’ve gained from them. I love my job so much and the fact that I get to continue to grow within our company. Personally, I’ve worked on myself to be stronger as an individual, learning to put myself first, vs always putting everyone else first. I’ve also learned to stand up for myself, my feelings and opinions which has been essential to my personal growth.

This year also brought a new (VERY part time) business opportunity for me in the essential oil company dōTerra. dōTerra has the most incredible Essential Oil, Skin Care and Health products. Finding these oils, was the key to my recovery and I am so very grateful every day for my beautiful friend who introduced me to them and the network of strong women that I’ve met. These oils are gods gift to earth, they offer you pretty much anything & everything you need and can help any aliment or issue. I wish EVERYONE had them, and used them, because they are that AMAZING. If you’re interested, please let me know – (Shameless Plug) Click here to learn more!

For all the wonderful experiences and growth this year had, I also had some of the most painful experiences I’ve personally had to go through.

When they (you know, “they”, the people that have all the sayings) say weddings bring out the best & worst in people… THEY weren’t lying… This year I experienced some of the most heart-breaking, trying, and impossible situations… situations that alone, would cripple a human… but I guess someone (up there) figured I could use a true test of strength, because I got hit with one thing after the next.

As a generally happy person, I saw some of my lowest moments this year, that truly tested my strength, well-being, and mental stability. There were days where I cried every minute I could, days I was just really ANGRY, days I was so hurt I couldn’t function and days where I just needed to sleep since I was so unbelievably exhausted by life.

BUT…

Through the love of my Fiancé, my wonderful parents, my fluffy babies, REALLY good friends (including my sisters and a couple of soul sistas), A LOT of tequila, french fries and a good therapist, I was able to cross over to the other side a stronger person (both mentally and emotionally).

Finally, as the year comes to a close, I am able focus on myself, my health and well-being. I am able to start to lose the weight I’ve gained (because, well, French fries are a coping tool), get back to the gym (which is good for my mental stability… Endorphins and all that) and finally LIVE, just being happy.

So my friends, that is a year in review. Rodney Atkins put best… “If you’re going thru hell… Keep on moving, don’t slow down… if you’re scared don’t show it” I hope whatever you’re going through gets better & that you remember how truly blessed you are. Try to find something good in your day to day life, even if its as small as the smile of a child you pass on the street. Work through it and you will feel stronger and proud once you do.

I wish you all a VERY Happy, Healthy and Wonderful New Year. I know 2018 is going to be even better than 2017…. BECAUSE WE’RE GETTING MARRIED and all the shit has already hit the fan, so its all good from here on out! <3

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28 is really close to 30…

I turn 28 on Sunday. Which honestly, I don’t know if I’m super excited for or super scared for.

27, was a pretty crazy year with some incredible Highs and super terrible lows.

The love of my life asking me to *finally* marry him, celebrating our engagement party (this past weekend) with our family and friends, paying off my tax & credit card debt, planning our wedding, making a significant dent in the principle of my student loans (after reading the Total Money Make Over”, major birthday celebrations, a girls trip to Sonoma Valley, making some pretty incredible new friends and bringing home our second fur baby were among the highest of the highs, I’ve ever experienced in my entire life.

But there were also some of the lowest lows… There was uncertainty, stress, anxiety and depression. There was stress about money (when is there not) and the all consuming thought that I will NEVER pay off my student loans… There was the desire to have a mental breakdown when life & work got to be too much and at points throughout the year becoming a person I didn’t know, nor liked very much at all!

I became a bundle of stress, anxiety and depression – I put on weight, my skin broke out and I was all consumed by life, but mainly the fact that I was just waiting for the next step and had no idea or control over when it came… Wondering all the W’s consumed my thoughts, conversations, emotions and every little ounce of me…

Waiting to get engaged was one of the hardest experiences (yes I’m aware how fortunate I am) I’ve ever had to go through. As a TYPE A – uber planner, not knowing when, where, how nearly killed me… But in the end, it was SO FUCKING WORTH IT.

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My best advice to those going through this currently… Hold out… The best guys take their time to truly think things through.

In hindsight, which is a bitch for always being 20/20, I am so very grateful he did it when HE and he alone was ready, because I know in my heart of hearts he wants to spend his life with me, just as much as I want to spend it with him and THAT is where my sureness and calmness comes from, the comfort of it all…

(When in doubt, hug something fluffy)

I am glad I never (truly) resorted to ultimatums (which wouldn’t have worked anyway, nor would I want to start my future as partners like that) and despite the fact that I couldn’t see it then, I am glad things unfolded as they did. Naturally, Organically, and right for US.

The minute we got engaged and A asked me to share the rest of his life with him, all the stress of the past year faded away. People began to tell me I looked “lighter” and was “glowing”… I seemed “Different” and “Calm”…

As a normally chaotic mess of a human, my best friend E, just last week told me I seemed “very calm” and while she didn’t want to question it, was slightly concerned… To which I replied, its a good thing, all feels right…

Which was all 100% true. Having that ring on my finger, hearing the words “Will You Marry Me” and the free reign to plan a wedding… thus taking the next steps towards our future gave me a sureness, certainty and a level of calm I can never explain. I TRULY believe I was meant to be married and having a partner to make life decisions with feels right.

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Major Shout out to my Girlfriends, Mom, Aunt & Sisters for dealing with my chaotic self during this period of time. Being on the other side, I thank you for you being my sounding board and calming presence in my life.

Additional and even MAJOR Shout out to A, for whom STILL wants to marry me after seeing me at what I am pretty sure was my worst over the past 12 months… *Insert Rolling Eye Emoji*

So, as I approach the fateful day (June 25th) of turning 28, I say… BRING. IT. FUCKING. ON! Bring it ON! 27 was another year of true adult growing pains, and while at the end of each year, I feel I have a better handle on this whole ADULTING & life thing, I can honestly say after this past year, I’ve got this thing on lock down…. (but seriously though, I have no idea what i’m doing, I’m making it up as I go along… :)) . 28 is going to be the most magical, incredible and LIFE CHANGING year… I can’t wait to see what it has in store for me, other than the one known truth that on 9.8.2018, I will be gaining a husband, another set of parents & siblings and another last name…. Because really, one just isn’t enough sometimes…